11 Apr


I’m allowing myself an hour of coffee and Teen Mom 3 before I do more work, before I leave for the airport, before I do more work, before I get on my flight to New York… to do more work.

It is unbelievable how connected I feel to the stories of these girls. OK, I don’t have a kid. And I’m not a fallen-from-grace cheerleader. But I’ve been let down by the person I thought loved me most. Sure, it was months ago now that it all culminated in the great pizza-eating, heart-breaking extravaganza of August 3rd, but it still hurts. And I think that’s OK, you know. I didn’t doubt that we were going to be together, get married, have babies. He constantly talked about these things. He did – not I. So as far as my head and my heart were concerned, I might as well already have that future because it was so, so real to me.

When I see the boys on this TV show act like such a**holes, it makes me mad. Falling out of love with people. Not knowing what they want. Needing space. Breaking up with the mother of their kid and then getting together with someone else three days later. But you kind of forgive them. Because they are 16 or 17-years-old. They’re just kids. They’re immature.

The question is whether they’re going to change as they get older, or whether it’s the fact they are men (or boys) that is the problem.

My ex was immature as f***. I was his first girlfriend (he was 30 when we met). Within weeks I was the “love of his life”, his “soul mate”, he had spent “his whole life looking for me”. At the time I liked hearing all these things. Now I know how the story ends, I think he was reckless and stupid and incredibly immature. How can you tell someone you are never going to leave them and then eat half a pizza and leave them? How can you then tell that person (me, I mean me) that they should feel lucky to have been in such an amazing relationship that was 99.9% perfect? The worst bit is, he thinks he is very mature – a sophisticated businessman/hipster. He is neither of these things. Well, he does business and stuff, but that’s about it.

For the sake of Mackenzie, Alex, Katie and Brianna (who is more beautiful than Halle Berry), I hope the men in their lives mature as time goes on. Because they’re stuck with these a**holes until those babies grow up. At least I’m free to try and find someone with a mental age of at least 25.

5 Responses to “Immaturity”

  1. luciddream85 April 11, 2014 at 12:26 pm #

    I’m stuck on Teen Mom 2. It makes me sad for these girls, though. I didn’t know Pizza of Doom was so immature. I don’t think men mature until near retirement, and even then it’s questionable. My grandpa is 74 and still acts like a teenager. Men and women sure are built differently.

  2. elizabethhiggins April 11, 2014 at 8:48 pm #

    I love Mackenzie and Bri, they’re my favorite. Bri is wise beyond her years and Mackenzie is just hard not to love. I’m also very sad to admit that my birthday is August 3rd.

  3. foodfortoomuchthought April 13, 2014 at 12:33 am #

    Reblogged this on Food For (Too Much) Thought..

  4. Shanmoo February 20, 2015 at 9:24 pm #

    11th April 2014 was probably the day I saw my ex’s true level of immaturity. I was off work sick and called him to ask if we could meet up to talk through what had happened. I didnt want us to see each other for the first time as broken up at work!! Warning signs – he said coldly he would just see me at the office??!! BB!!
    As if that wasnt bad enough, when I finally persuaded him to meet up.. told him why Id shouted at him.. how I felt… Said we need to work around this and through it… The man who had virtually moved in with me after a few dates, told me he had waited 20 years to meet me and it was worth it (he was 41 I was his first LTR since university!!!), he would never leave me, Id never get rid of him, he wanted me to move into a house with him that he would buy and wanted me to have children with him and HE was the one that kept going on about it, Im 45 as far as I was concerned I was past it for babies… We looked at a house only 2 weeks before and had just talked about starting trying for a baby…
    This same man looked at me coldly and said he hadn’t wanted to be with me since Christmas. I was negative, and he was a happy bloke and didn’t want any problems in his life. He wanted an easy life. He wanted a doormat to go out with.
    My negativity? I was down after a visit to a physiotherapist put me in extreme pain. Obviously far too much of an adult thing for him to cope with.
    But how little did I know that whilst he went off hopping and skipping yey Im free of the witch and all her problems, so I can get someone like me now, … that I would hit the most rockbottom I had ever been in my life and everything would just go downhill from there due to having to work with the BB!
    Sorry for overtaking your blog here as I dont have one but yours and my exes would be twins if they werent different ages! Funnily he has a twin!!

    • aprileb February 20, 2015 at 9:31 pm #

      Hello! I’ve been reading your comments all evening as you write them. I’m super tired and going to bed shortly, but I did want to respond to you tonight (and I’ll write more tomorrow). First of all, I’m so sorry you are going through this. Second of all, ten months (is that how long it has been?) is nothing. Nothing. Your whole life changed. Do not feel bad that you are still hurting. And finally, you need to know this: 18 months on I am OK. In fact, I’m the happiest I’ve ever been. I’m the most confident I’ve ever been. I am single, and I love my life. Although I wish I had never had to go through all of this (and that you weren’t going through it) it brought me to where I am now. I promise you, you are going to be OK. Just. Keep. Going. x

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