One more sleep

9 Dec

I’m not really a Leona Lewis fan. She has always struck me as looking too much like a camel. But, I’ve been listening to her new Christmas song ‘One More Sleep’ pretty much non-stop this morning.

Fabulous Christmas pop.

It’s very Mariah-esque.

And the words. Ahh, the words. A girl in love singing to the one she loves, who is going to be with her for Christmas. She’s counting down the sleeps.

I’ll admit it: I was this girl. When my ex did his first stint working in New York for four weeks, I counted down the sleeps until he was back. And I used to say on the occasional email (not every email I hasten to add), “Oohhh, nine more sleeps”, or “Two more sleeps ‘til I can snog your face.”

When I reached the point of one more sleep, I was beyond excited. I baked him his favourite cupcakes. I planned to leave work early the next day. I hardly slept, I was so excited to see him again.

It turned out to be one of the most depressing and hurtful weekends of my entire life. I went into work on the Monday morning and collapsed on one of my colleagues in tears. Ever the professional.

He came home. He ate the cupcakes. But he didn’t seem to want me around. He even gave me a lecture about how, “We are just two people who are going out. We aren’t married.” Let me tell you, he was the one always talking about marriage and babies and moving in. Not me. Him.

He said I got too excited about him coming home. He seemed particularly offended that I had counted the sleeps.

I asked him if he’d prefer that I didn’t give a sh** that he was home. If he’d rather have a girlfriend who was cold and thoughtless and didn’t make red velvet cupcakes that taste like drops of heaven.

Apparently he would.

17 Responses to “One more sleep”

  1. intothebeauty December 9, 2013 at 3:42 pm #

    Seriously? HA! He didn’t like the fact that you, uhh. Missed him?

    You know how girls tend to date asshole guys?

    Well, it sounds like your ex is into girls who are bitches.

    Jussst saying.


    • aprileb December 9, 2013 at 3:43 pm #

      I know! But it makes me think that I shouldn’t be so nice to people. I love doing nice things for people. Now I feel like i need to hold back or I end up letting people take me for granted.


      All too difficult…


      • intothebeauty December 9, 2013 at 4:09 pm #

        I like doing nice things for people too! It’s what happens when you’re a sweet woman.

        It would be nice to know who’s worth doing the nice stuff for. I feel like even when I say I’m not going to do everything for everyone anymore, I never live up to it.

        It’s in our blood. Just have to find people worth doing those things for. SO many other men would love them damn cupcakes.

        Have you talked to B lately??

      • aprileb December 9, 2013 at 4:12 pm #

        Very true, my dear. Very true. And I guess I get pleasure out of doing nice things for people (when they don’t throw it back in my face), so…

        B, oh B. After me moaning to people that he was texting too much, he has chilled a bit on that front. I texted him on Saturday, he texted back, I texted back. Last night he texted me late on. I told him I was in bed and need to be in work early but gave him some good chat about my hilarious weekend. He responded, “Ok cool. goodnight x.” Today I emailed him a picture of a snow fox. He emailed back saying how happy it looked…

        Slow burner.

        We are supposed to meet up on Sunday but he has to confirm because he has some family stuff going on.

        We. Shall. See.


      • intothebeauty December 9, 2013 at 4:19 pm #

        Ahh good! At least you guys are chatting still. I think some guys just get really excited when they find a girl that they really enjoy the conversation with and he might have realized he went a little overboard with the communication. I’m sure he paused and thought to himself, “Um. I need to stop texting her so much-I look like a girl.” Haha

        Hey, especially with this time of the season, everyone gets put on the slow burner. This season is a time for family, new and old friends, and trying to get all of your work done before Christmas. Even I only get to see The Drummer once a week for the time being while I’m getting through this crazy season and school. Slow and steady is the best! x

      • aprileb December 9, 2013 at 4:23 pm #

        Oh yeah, I’m all about slow and steady for now. For all I know he might be thinking that we get on, but he doesn’t fancy me so he’ll just do the second date to make sure. There is no way of knowing.

        Meanwhile, I have tonight free so I’m going for a massage. Booked a reiki session for Saturday, and psychic for the 21st. I am becoming obsessed with this stuff.

        Very jealous that you guys have snow x

      • intothebeauty December 9, 2013 at 4:31 pm #

        Oh!!! Reiki! April that’s absolutely amazing. My mother took the first set of classes and it really changed her life. Definitely stick with that. It’s a good way to release any unwanted negative energy out of your wonderful self!

        Oh yes! I love the first snowfalls. After a month I’m sick of it, but for now it’s beautiful

      • aprileb December 9, 2013 at 4:37 pm #

        I did reiki a couple of weeks ago (should really write a post about it). It might just be a coincidence, but the next few days after I didn’t cry at all and I felt… better. It could be a coincidence. But maybe not? x

  2. jadedwildcat December 9, 2013 at 4:22 pm #

    I don’t know about the rest of your guy but that one thing reminds me of mine…how he was the one always talking about marriage, babies etc., and yet when you’re the one getting serious and even trying too hard, they pull back or resist?!
    I just don’t get it. I got proposed to on three separate occasions by the same guy, and yup he was the one pushing for a life together and babies and always bringing up how his mother would love a grandchild, etc… but still, it was me always seeming to pull the relationship forward – not him.
    I just can’t for the life of me understand, and I think it will always, always bother me unless I figure it out…

    • aprileb December 9, 2013 at 4:25 pm #

      Yes. I think this is what will always bother me too. Always. What on earth was it all based on if he was never in love with me? And how come I end up trying to piece my life back together and looking like a fool?

      My counsellor said he was trying to be “relationship guy” but had no idea what that meant. It’s easy to say stuff, right? Not so easy to actually do them.

      Some lucky weirdo will propose to me one day. And some lucky weirdo will propose to you and mean it xx

  3. thehowlingfantogs December 9, 2013 at 5:33 pm #

    Is looking like a kind of animal reason not to enjoy someone’s music? Some great one liners on here today :0)

  4. elizabethhiggins December 9, 2013 at 8:02 pm #

    I listened this today too, I actually kind of like it. In a depressing kind of way?

  5. foodfortoomuchthought December 9, 2013 at 11:43 pm #

    I feel like listening to this song would upset me rather than make me love it and want to sing along. I’m all for empowering, shout-along-in-the-shower songs at the moment!

  6. ifthebootfitz December 10, 2013 at 7:33 am #

    Ew, okay reading the part about him wanting all this moving in, marriage and babies THEN reading about how he was offended? Ew ew ew I hate guys like that! Lol double standards out the butt!

    • aprileb December 10, 2013 at 9:17 am #

      “Double standards out the butt” – ha! Great expression

      • ifthebootfitz December 11, 2013 at 3:40 am #

        Haha, i was hoping you’d get a laugh out of that!

  7. plf1990 December 10, 2013 at 12:23 pm #

    Oh dear I really should not have watched the video for that 😦 I like the song too, though.

    Your ex was an arsehole, pure and simple. x

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