The guilt dinosaur

29 Oct

For a month, between April and May, my ex’s house was being renovated. He came to live here. We got on great. We talked a lot about how fun it was living together. And, of course, the plan was still that we would live together full-time after the summer.

At the end of his stay here at April Towers he gave me a gift – an original print by the French street artist, Dran. Le poulet-dinosaure (the chicken-dinosaur). I love my poulet-dinosaure. Check him out.

My ex gave me a big speech when he presented the picture to me, all about how I was the best girlfriend in the world. I was overwhelmed. I cried. And then we held each other all night and watched Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (ohhhh the irony).

I called my dinosaur Claude, because he’s French. We put him up above my sofa so he could watch TV with me while my ex was in New York.

The night of the pizza of doom, my ex actually commented on how great Claude looked in my flat. And then he stuffed half a pizza into his mouth, and promptly broke my heart.

I now realise that Claude was never a token of love: he was a token of guilt. He was effectively rent for my ex living here for a month. After all, he was never in love with me.


My friends think I should sell Claude.

Looking at him does make me sad, and kind of angry. But Claude didn’t do anything wrong. And he’s quite beautiful.

Meanwhile, to celebrate my 100 followers and give myself a pat on the back for keeping at my new job, I’ve ordered a print of my own. I’m a massive fan of the husband/wife artistic team Kozyndan. They have recently created something quite majestic – an underwater scene of manatees and rabbits living in harmony. I had to have this in my life.

Whatever becomes of Claude, my manatees are going to take pride of place on the wall from now on.

Because my manatees are a token of love. Love for myself.

I’m a good person with a big heart who didn’t do anything wrong. I deserve my manatees.

10 Responses to “The guilt dinosaur”

  1. elizabethhiggins October 29, 2013 at 10:22 pm #

    Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind is my ex’s favorite movie. I now hate that movie.

    • aprileb October 29, 2013 at 10:24 pm #

      I now hate it too. Currently watching ‘He’s Just Not That Into You’. I’m not going to watch the bullish** ending, though.

      • elizabethhiggins October 29, 2013 at 10:46 pm #

        Don’t do it, I watched it last week and it just resulted in an angry ending bashing Alex, men in general, and Jennifer Anniston.

  2. elizabethhiggins October 29, 2013 at 10:47 pm #

    *with me bashing.

    • aprileb October 29, 2013 at 10:52 pm #

      Don’t bash Jennifer Anniston! She’s had such a hard time in love too. I’m turning it off now, it’s getting to the bit where it all becomes stupid. I never watch the happy endings any more.

  3. K. A. Smith October 29, 2013 at 11:29 pm #

    love manatees. I got to pet a baby one named Corazoncito (little heart) they are so sweet. good for you. don’t sell Claude if you don’t want to. if you can live with Claude I say keep him. He’s pretty cute!

    • aprileb October 29, 2013 at 11:32 pm #

      I want to pet a baby manatee!

  4. elizabethhiggins October 29, 2013 at 11:29 pm #

    I regret bashing Jennifer – after all, she’s always my pick me up on Friends!

    • aprileb October 29, 2013 at 11:39 pm #

      Yeah, we can’t turn on Jen. She understands broken heartedness. I have always despised Brad Pitt in loyalty to her.

  5. Oli February 1, 2014 at 11:11 pm #

    Is this dran print for sale?? Please let me know.

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